A Hand
by Icephoinex
Summary: Jude, Milla, Ludger, Alvin and Elle board the Pelune. They are not the same people when they disembark. The scenes from the Pelune seen from Jude's eyes. Rated T for Violence


**This is set just after Milla, Jude, Ludger, Elle, Alvin and Marcus board the Pelune.**

 **Spoilers**

 **Tales of Xillia is the property of Namco Bandai.**

"Exodus goons" Jude muttered, spying the guards at the door.

"It's happening" Alvin replied before jerking his head at Marcus to play decoy. Reluctantly Marcus made his way over forcing a fake smile onto his gloomy face.

The guards met him partway, clearly wary "I'm Marcus with infiltration. I need to talk to the main squad" Jude could hear his voice trembling slightly at the stress.

Clearly the guards picked up on it as well and they readied an attack stance "Freeze. You're in violation of mission protocols.

"Wait! "Marcus stuttered "C'mon you guys. Just hear me out."

"Save it for the holding cell." This wasn't going well, Jude gritted his teeth.

"This is bad." provided Alvin. "I thought for sure they'd take the bait."

"Lets give this a little more time" suggested Ludger quietly. Jude nodded, they might still get a chance to jump the guards if they turned their backs.

Milla wasn't having any of it though "We don't have time to spare" she demanded, leaping over the crate weapon drawn.

Quickly she took out the male guard by slashing at his legs, turning her back to the other to make sure he was down. She was struck from behind by the female guard and trapped as her comrade rose to his feet. "Die" the guard shouted as she charged her weapon at the trapped Milla.

Jude was rolling over the crate to help without even thinking about it, vaguely hearing Alvin's cry of "Here comes the Cavalry" He struck the female guard and she staggered as Milla struggled loose.

"Let me go!" she shouted swinging her sword as she broke free and catching both guards in the back as they turned on Jude. Eyes closed she haughtily sheathed her sword, pretending she hadn't needed assistance in the first place.

"Got to keep your head about you or you'll lose it" Alvin commented dryly.

"So what if I do? Isn't that what you want?" she snapped.

"No! Of course it isn't!" Jude responded in the same tone. Where was this coming from? "What about you Milla? Is that what you want?"

She looked away from Jude's sharp glare before changing the subject "Where's the Chancellor?"

Marcus looked lost for a second before realising she was asking him. "Oh... I know that. She's being held in the central hall with her aides." Jude continued staring at Milla during Marcus' explanation before grunting slightly and looking away.

"I owe you one Marcus" Alvin offered, breaking the semi-awkward silence.

"You don't seem like a total loser. You should quite doing bad stuff, okay?" Elle offered.

Marcus laughed awkwardly at the backhanded compliment "Maybe you're right". Jude looked over from Marcus to see Milla stalking towards the door, Elle at her side. It tore at him, she looked just like Milla, especially the way her hair swayed as she walked. But it wasn't her, scowling Jude set off after the pair missing Ludger and Alvin's worried looks.

The inside of the ship set Jude on edge, it looked exactly like the Zenethra. Just after they enter Jude spied two injured people on the floor and runs over to them and casts Healer over them until they are able to stand. "There's gotta be a lot more out there injured if things are this bad." Alvin supplied. "What are we supposed to do? I don't want to abandon anyone, but let's get real: we don't have the time either".

He had a point, Jude pulled himself out of his memories for a moment "Considering the size of the ship and the time the terrorist incident occurred, it should take about thirty minutes to make it to the rear of the ship. And from the looks of things I'd say we need to get to those who are injured in about the same time frame. Let's get on it"

"Gotcha. So the plan is we're going to help those injured while moving on ahead ourselves, right?" Jude smiled, sometimes Alvin knew him too well, there was no way Jude would be able to walk past the injured if they had any time to spare. "Well, you don't need to tell me twice. It's just human decency to help 'em. But remember: our priority is to quell the terrorists here. Make sure you got that." It was amazing how much Alvin had changed in the past year. Certainly how much he had changed since the Zenethra. No, best not to think of the Zenethra.

They made their way quickly through the ship, helping those they could see, fighting if it was unavoidable. Occasionally they saw small bundles, people they were too late to save. Jude sheltered Elle from the sight as best he could. Milla seemed to be fighting with reckless abandon and it worried Jude. What was going on in her mind? Milla stumbled and Jude caught her before she could hit the floor. "Gotta watch your step Milla" he held her shoulders for a second longer and their eyes met, she looked down in embarrassment and saw it was a body she had stumbled over. As Milla looked aside from his gaze Jude released her to continue on.

"Hey" she called from behind him, he paused, half expecting a thank you. "Tell me the truth. Is it difficult for you to call me Milla?" That wasn't what he expected. He didn't want to talk about his Milla. Not on this ship anyway, he was plagued by memories enough as it was.

He schooled his expression before turning around to meet her question. "Why would it be difficult? You're Milla just as much as she is" He dodged the question.

"Not to you, no. To you I'm just a double. A counterfeit." Was that right? No.

"I don't think that way" he replied honestly.

"How do you think of me?" Did she really have to do this now?

"I'm curious myself actually" Ludger interjected.

Jude levelled a stare at him "Seriously, Ludger?" Why was everyone pushing this? He saw Alvin pretending not to listen behind Ludger's shoulder and sighed. "Look this isn't real versus not real. My Milla and you are two different people. That's all there is to it." He dodged the real question again. He clenched a fist over his heart, hoping he would get away with it this time. Truth was he wasn't sure what he thought of the Milla in front of him. They had the same body. same voice, but the personalities were so different it was hard to compare the two. She simply wasn't the Milla he loved. But. She looked so much like her that sometimes he was caught off-guard and his heart leaped.

"Well, thanks for telling me." Jude breathed a small sigh of relief as he turned around and carried on walking. Looked like he had diffused that well enough. He threw himself into healing the passengers they came across, trying to distract himself from his whirling thoughts.

They got about half way through the ship before they stumbled into the arms of a scout. "Maxwell?" he demanded.

"What if I am?" she asked haughtily.

"I've finally found you" he declared before attacking her. The others jumped in to assist her.

"What do you want from me?" Milla demanded.

"Milla calm down" Jude called back. A battle was no time to get distracted. She ignored his shout and launched herself at the scout, burning through artes until the scout dropped.

She dropped to her knee as the battle ended. Worn out. "I can do this" she told herself. Jude wasn't so sure she could at that pace. He saw the scout slowly rise to his feet to one side and called out a warning as he saw the bomb in his hands, even as he placed himself in front of the exhausted Milla. Everything went white as the explosion went off and Jude felt the heat sear his arms as they protected his face. Blinking he saw Ludger beside him protecting Elle and Alvin the other side of Milla. All that was left of the would-be assassin was smoke and dust.

"Milla, Are you OK?" Jude asked even as he turned to check on her. She didn't seem to be listening.

"He blew himself up because of me." she seemed to be in shock.

"Hate is too weak a word to describe Exodus' feeling for Milla." Alvin supplied.

"It's her own fault" Milla retorted "She didn't finish them off when she had the chance."

Jude stepped in to defend his Milla on reflex "I'm glad she didn't, at least."

"Huh?" Milla looked confused.

Jude hesitated before explaining "My father is an Elympion. He used to be a member of Exodus. But he fell in love with a Rieze Maxian. My mother. Once I was born he gave up his life as an Exodus agent"

"Wait, What?" Too late Jude remembered that this Milla slaughtered all of Exodus, the possibility that she had killed both Jude and his father in her world occurred to him the same time it did to her. Jude could have hit himself. Or maybe he always remembered and that was why he subconsciously kept his distance.

Thankfully Alvin broke the silence "Looks like they are onto us. We better move." Without looking back at Milla, Jude ran ahead. He needed to sort his mind out, being on the Pelune was really messing with him. He threw himself into healing people as they ran by, determined to distract himself.

As they approached the end of the ship Jude glanced back at Milla "You're looking a little pale. Do you need a break?"

"No, I'm fine, its nothing" she responded weakly. Jude sighed to himself, looks like he had made things worse by not thinking before he spoke. He had only made Milla more depressed, hopefully she wouldn't do anything foolish. They continued making good time throughout the ship and arrived before the chambers doors with five minutes to spare and confident they had saved everyone they could.

"The central hall should be just ahead" Jude commented based on his memory of the Zenethra.

"Yeah" Alvin agreed "they'll probably have hostages, so... Prepare yourself"

Jude nodded and gathered the group casting Healer, clearing them of any scratches, bruises and in his case burns before munching on a pineapple gel. Healing the wounded on the way had really taken a toll on his mana. Taking a deep breath Jude and Ludger pushed the doors open.

"Don't come any closer!"

The panicked scream stopped them in their tracks, Jude looked up and saw Chancellor Marcia at the mercy of Rideaux. What was he doing here? "No one gave you the floor, Madame Chancellor." Rideaux smirked, forcing her head into a desk.

"Rideaux... Why are you doing this?" Jude demanded. Had he gone mad? Was he working with Exodus all along? Theories ran through Jude's brain.

"Awww, now don't give me that look" Rideaux pretended to look hurt as he prowled along the stage towards one of the aides before kicking the man in the face with a flourish and turning his back to the group. "I'm here to help you solve your Maxwell problem." As he spoke he transformed into what looked like a Chromatus state similar to Ludger's. Oh this wasn't good.

He half saw Rideaux move before he was beside him, Alvin barely dodged as Jude threw his guard up. Rideaux didn't even pause and instead aimed a swipe at Ludger and Milla's back. They jumped out the way, drawing their weapons in one fluid movement. Milla had barely drawn hers before Rideaux kicked her in the head knocking her to the ground and turning to advance on Ludger. Jude ran to Milla's side as Ludger and Rideaux exchanged blows, Milla accepted Jude's hand up before launching herself into the air to slice Rideaux as he kicked off of Ludger, forcing the monochrome haired boy to the floor. As Rideaux landed Jude saw his moment to jump in and intercepted Rideaux as he landed. Rideaux dodged Jude's kick even as he kicked Milla again. How was he so fast? Even Jude was struggling to match his speed. Rideaux turned to Jude even as Jude saw Alvin's sword appear from behind him to slice while Rideaux's back was turned. Rideaux dodged as Jude flipped away before sweeping back in to flank Rideaux.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jude hesitated for less than a second as Milla's cry but it was enough of an opening.

Rideaux caught one of Jude's fists as he attacked and held it, twisting so Jude couldn't move even as he replied "Spirius knows the calculatrics arte for summoning Maxwell." He wasn't even breaking a sweat. Jude frantically struggled against Rideaux's grip but it was no good, he only squeezed harder causing Jude to gasp in pain and stop struggling concerned Rideaux might snap his arm. Seeing Jude trapped and in pain Alvin frantically launched an attack on Rideaux which he calmly dodged even as he carried on talking. Jude was forced almost to his knees to avoid dislocating his arm as Rideaux paid no heed to the angle he held him at. As Alvin attacked, Jude closed his eyes to the pain and the rush of humiliation from being held so easily.

Jude heard gunshots before a grunt from Alvin "Yeah right Rideaux. And I'm the King of Rieze Maxia". Jude heard another grunt and a slam that sounded uncomfortably like Alvin hitting the floor. Jude couldn't even turn to look at his friend as he heard the air whoosh out of him from what sounded like a kick to the stomach. Now two of them were stuck, Ludger and Milla though now recovered from Rideaux's attacks wouldn't be able to attack without risking Jude and Alvin's lives. They were at an impasse until Rideaux made a move.

"Would you still think I was bluffing if I said Spirius was founded by Kresnik, the first human ever to summon Maxwell?" Rideaux pulled Jude tighter to him and Jude could feel the bones in his arm grinding against each other even as his shoulder protested against the unnatural angle. "If only the arte weren't so... messy." There was a crunch from Jude's arm and he caught his breath as a rush of burning pain stabbed its way through him. Before he could process what that meant Rideaux leaned in closer and almost purred in Jude's ear "First of all you need to have a living circuit." Rideaux released Jude's now broken arm and swung Jude around to face him and before Jude could even appreciate the removal of pressure from his shoulder Rideaux pushed him back towards a pillar, Jude flew back and his newly released arm impacted on the pillar before Jude's body could soften the blow. There was another crunch, this time from Jude's elbow. He cried out in shock and pain and was vaguely aware of Alvin doing the same as he hit another pillar head first on the other side of the door. Red light surrounded them, pressing them against the wall. His breath felt short; pain was shooting up his arm and it felt like burning electricity was running through his vein as his mana was being drawn out of him. It was hard to focus on what was going on in the room but he needed to. He needed to get free to help Milla, Ludger and Elle. Milla charged forward with a cry but Rideaux flipped and kicked the sword out of her hand, it skidded across the floor and stopped near Rideaux. "And the secret ingredient is..." Rideaux declared delightedly as the floor around Milla glowed green "A living sacrifice".

Jude's eyes went wide as he saw Milla start to fall. Ludger was there in a second to catch her, activating his Chromatus and using the lance to reach down to Milla.

"Ludger! Milla!" Elle cried from the edge of the room.

"Damn you!" Jude cried using the little breath remaining in his lungs. Alvin was silent, Jude wondered if he was even conscious at this point.

"There's no need for you to feign anger, Jude Mathis." Jude gaped at him even as his sight darkened. Feign? No! He was livid. "You miss Maxwell don't you? Your beloved wandering spirit." Yes he wanted to see her. Not before he had talked properly to this Milla. Before he could explain himself. This Milla deserved better. He wanted to see his beloved Milla that was true. But not like this. Ludger was reaching down into the hole into the floor and Milla's hand gripped into his. Her nails were digging into Ludger's skin as she frantically tried to hold on.

Jude's last sight was the blood running down Ludger's wrist into the hole as her nails frantically scrabbled for survival.

 **XXX xxx XXX**

He was on the floor. Somehow in Jude's mind that seemed wrong, hadn't he been fighting something, his mana certainly felt raw and there was an ache in his limbs. No not an ache, pain. Screaming pain. His mind sharpened even as his vision swam as he tried to move his arm, a gentle scan with the little mana he had left showed a shattered elbow and both bones fractured in his forearm. He forced his eyes to focus on the room and became aware of a blue light suffusing the room and a soft, comforting presence. It couldn't be. Jude stumbled to his feet and gently held his right arm in his left, trying to stop himself from jostling it too much and stared at the figure in the middle of the room.

It was Milla. His Milla. He stared at her even as he stumbled towards her, she seemed unaware of him as the four spirits surrounded her, welcoming her back and offering her their aid. He was half aware of Alvin limping towards her as well. Well didn't they look a mess. "Milla..." he whispered her name. He couldn't help himself. He stopped as she put a finger to his lips. they stared into each others eyes. No words were needed between them. It could have been minutes or hours they were standing there together, he had no concept of time as he started into her eyes. She fed some of her mana into him through that touch and it made his lips burn even as it soothed him, repairing some of the damage from being part of the circuit. He felt as though they were alone in the world.

Rideaux's voice broke through their peace "How nice of you to join us Milla Maxwell!" he taunted. Stunned as Jude was by Milla's presence he missed Rideaux's smirk at Jude's cradled arm. Milla wasn't so oblivious. She broke off her contact with Jude and walked towards Elle, Jude exchanged a smile with Alvin, happy to see him standing and to share in some of the wonder he felt.

"May I borrow that sword from you" Milla's voice broke the silence and he looked over at her and Elle. Why did Elle have the other Milla's sword. What had be missed while he was out of it, he shared confused glances with Alvin before darting his gaze to Ludger's. His heart stilled at what he saw. Whatever he had missed had been important. He would have to ask later. Delicately of course. Elle offered up the sword without a word. "Thank you." Milla walked back to the middle and stood in front of the small group facing Rideaux. She aimed her sword and the group readied themselves, Jude and Alvin staying to the rear while they recovered. "How nice of you to summon me here" Milla called out and Jude felt his heart soar to be fighting alongside her again.

The sprites started attacking Rideaux but he dodged them all, as agile as ever in his Chromatus form. "So that's how it is" he hissed. "Looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of the abyss!" As Rideaux rushed forward to engage the group several Exodus agents appeared from around the room to give him support. Jude linked with Alvin and winced as he felt the pain in his ribs and head, glancing over he saw Alvin's face contort in pain as well as his body suffered a ghost of Jude's pain from his arm. They met gazes for a second before Jude began using the mana Milla gave him to heal them both even as Alvin rushed forward to take out the smaller agents, leaving Rideaux for Milla and Ludger. If they rushed in as they were now they would just get caught again or killed. By the time Jude had exhausted his borrowed mana both he and Alvin were fighting fit again, the areas were still tender but nothing was broken any more.

"Are you two ready" Milla called out as Jude's healing stopped.

"Yeah" came Jude's short reply. He was ready to pay Rideaux back.

"We'll wipe that smile away" Alvin replied, his rage thrumming through the link. With a shared smile they broke their link and Jude linked with Ludger while Alvin linked with Milla.

Through the link Jude could feel Ludger's wounds from fighting Rideaux before as well as his numbness from whatever had happened to the other Milla. There were scratches on the inside of his wrist from where Milla had held onto him so tight. He resisted Jude healing them and Jude understood, they were something Ludger wanted to carry. He set about caring for Ludger's other bruises before running in to focus on the fight. Their orbs were charged so as Ludger launched a Crimson Fury, Jude jumped in to transform it onto a Swallow Edge. Rideaux flew into the air where Milla met him and unleashed a combo on him before he could recover. Rideaux fell to the floor and was on his feet in seconds. With a nod Ludger and Jude severed their link and Jude linked with Milla while Alvin and Ludger provided long range support from their guns. It was thrilling to link with her again. He swallowed another Pineapple Gel and felt its effect spread across the link to her as well. The battle seemed to last forever without much progress and they had to stay constantly on their guard. Jude fell back to link with Alvin part way through as his newly healed arm began to throb so he could retreat and heal people as they needed it. Ludger launched into his Chromatus as Rideaux began to get more vicious and desperate to finished him off. It seemed like no time had passed but Ludger seemed tired and Rideaux stumbled muttering "This has to be a joke". Jude hoped he never found out what it was like to be hit by that ability.

Milla sighed after the battle "Thank you. I won't forget you" Jude wondered who she was talking to. Did she have some link to the other Milla perhaps?

"Jude?" Elle looked up at him "Who is this?"

Jude didn't know what to say. "Well.." he began before falling silent. Clearly something bad had happened to the other Milla; Elle's face was covered in scratches and tear tracks. At her sorrowful look he fell silent, he had no idea how to explain this to her.

They turned their attention back to Rideaux as he struggled to his feet, his Chromatus spent. "Well aren't you a strong one Milla Maxwell. I admit, I'm rather impressed." Rideaux voice distracted Jude from his thoughts. He was still standing? "I hope you'll go after the Waymarker with a similar sense of fervour."

"Shut up" Ludger snapped. Jude didn't think he had ever seen him so angry.

"Spare me your indignation" Rideaux patronised through his pain.

"Don't you lecture me" Milla scolded. Rideaux bowed mockingly in her direction before turning, clicking his fingers and vanishing in a cloud of smoke. Jude saw Ludger gritting his teeth in anger out of the corner of his eye.

The party heaved a sigh of relief and swallowed some gels to help recover themselves. Chancellor Marcia rose from where she had been hiding and went to go help the aide Rideaux had kicked earlier. She stood before them, calm and in control as if she had never been held hostage. "You have my thanks." You're here from Spirius, right?" she spoke formally so Jude and the others hung back so Ludger could talk to her, he was the one from Spirius after all. Chancellor Marcia extended her hand in thanks and Ludger nodded and moved to take it but his hand stopped just short of reaching hers and he stared at it. Milla looked at him concerned and Jude recognised it as the hand with scratches around the wrist, the hand that the other Milla had been holding on to. Chancellor Marcia seemed to understand and dropped her hand rather than distract Ludger from his darkening thoughts.

"Hey Ludger" Elle had no such reservation "Where's Milla?" Jude winced, whatever had happened when he had lost consciousness, Ludger clearly felt responsible.

"The other one... is gone" Milla was also running short on tact today it seemed. Jude didn't want to lie to Elle but she was only a child. She wouldn't be able to understand. Unnoticed by everyone else Jude clenched his fist as his face twisted into a frown. The last words he had had with the other Milla weren't good and now she was gone.

Silent tears ran down his face.

 **This is a prequel to my first story and once again I have focussed on Jude. For some reason I never really connected with Ludger, I think it was because he was so silent and didn't have the same character growth as Jude has over the two games.**

 **I'm using these stories as writing practise so they won't all be like this where I rewrite scenes, some will be cannon divergence as well. Although I may visit THAT scene in Hamil at some point from Xillia 1. Not for a little while though as have other bunnies plotting away.**

 **Please review :)**


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